Tuesday, May 24, 2011



I have been advised to LAUGH at the absurdity of life every morning.

Also that, Goodness is to the core of my being and I should do nothing to change it. Goodness speaks in a whisper, evil shouts and gets deafening, and one tends to give in. I must not.

There are times when you want goodness to be reciprocated by others. And you hate when your goodness is abused. It goes without saying that you know exactly when your goodness is a matter of abuse, as goodness can never be abused clandestinely. But, sometimes, being abused is preferable to being alone.

I was told that be the way you are. Do what you feel and don’t try effect change in others. Do it because you want to do it and not because you want it to be reciprocated.

In that case, I asked myself, do I want to be good? I do not know. The reasons in me said don’t be stupid to be good. But, I keep reason at bay in tricky situations, because if reason has answer then it is not a tricky situation. Also, reason demanded to curb my instinct, when I did curb my instincts, I was still miserable.

Those who do not reciprocate generosity with goodness or reciprocate it with indifference or with clapper claws it is their problem. Feel pity at them for a fleeting moment, wish them good, and remain anchored to your core.

So I have to be myself; do it the way it makes best sense to me. It could be good or bad.

Then, I was advised shun the need to react. To react is a sure way to suffer. Also this way I make others suffer too. I am reacting too much these days. I react to those I can get away doing so, we all do, that is so hypocritical.

At least, I know I am reacting. So as a matter of practice, I will keep a tab on me, and stop reacting even if I feel compelling need to do it. Even Aristotle found it difficult, who am I? He said: It is easy to perform a good action, but not easy to acquire a settled habit of performing such actions.

Expectations are distracting and hurting; they consume mind space too much. Therefore, I was told to learn to let go. Forgive (even if there is nothing to forgive or no forgiveness is sought) and forget (the problem is when you try forget, you are actually remembering). This will vacate my mind space for things that are generally preferable, though not always desirable. And must remember: Good and bad men are less than they seem as pointed out by an English poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

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