Monday, December 24, 2012

Merry Christmas!

Light the light of reason

Wish you all a Merry Christmas in this agitated times — the cold days in Delhi have unleashed volcanic passions!

The numbed anger found vent in the brutality meted out to a young girl. The anger is against the absence of rule of law and the demons that rule the mind of some.

On a different note, I have made so many commitments today. A date with my mother is what I am looking forward to, followed by engagements of job, meetings and a lively evening that promises to extend late, well past the midnight. All this put pressure on my reckless and restless being. 

I am looking for a silver lining as the cold day, today, would die in the blanket of the impregnable fog.

Another year will meet its end soon to dawn a new one. And the days will continue to slip away before a listless bystander, that’s me. The young are getting older, child pre-empt adulthood.  

In a world of convoluted expectations, from others, I seek peace, seeking is self defeating, so I seek for others something GOOD and hope- is a lifeline- that GOOD sense prevail over non-sense. And people feel happier, such a loaded word, comparatively to their usual self.

I would advise us all to withdraw a bit, as I try to do the same myself, to witness the world and not necessarily participate. 

A girl, though her body marred by certain humans possessed by the Satan, will live on to assert that human spirit is indomitable.  No act of vandalism can curb the spirit of life. And the honour is integral to one's being and is untouched by any act of savagery.

So fight not but light a lamp (not at India Gate, preferably) to illuminate the dark alleys of conscience with reason and let not you be a source of miseries to others. 

It has to be a Merry Christmas!

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Shut up!

Some say because they have a need to say. The need to tell. The need to discuss. The need to inform. The need to own up. The need to explain. The need to articulate. They need to be understood. I have all these needs in me.

What do you do when you tell?

When you tell you provide information. Some information is better than no information. But, is equally true, that partial information can be disastrous. In the affairs of men nothing is back and white. We exist and play in the grey area. No amount of information can sufficiently decode the complex web that is a human mind. There are symptoms that hint at something. Symptoms are  convenient generalisations to understand the complexities of human mind. But there is something very basic that explains all the complexities. And I know what explains my complex mind. But there is no word that captures the real idea of what it is. I want to tell what it is but my descriptions create a different picture. 

There are weak moments where you feel the greater need to find and utter that you think you are.  You look for empathic ears that you trust. You find. You say. And get misunderstood. In my case all the time. Or feel misunderstood. Or even worse not able to say it. And then end up saying what you didn't intended to say.  

As you would know by now reading the above three paragraphs that I have this great ability to say things that add up to nothing. You can squarely blame me for it for offering you to read something meaningless. 

I am tired of fighting this identity business of who I am for I need to be something. And many identities are mutually exclusive. If you are something means equally well that you are not something else. So for a segment of humanity you become a pariah. 

Beyond identities and demands of identities to lead life a certain way is freedom. I want to break free to freedom. I find my freedom is critically dependent on freedom of others. My freedom is not isolated from that of others. What kind of a freedom is this?

I see freedom so clearly in some people when I interact with them. I see it all the time in them. I see things beyond the obvious. The freedom in others might sometimes be suppressed, but it is there. And when I talk about that freedom, my freedom, their freedom, I seem to enter in a trap. My idea of freedom comes across as a constraint. My sharing of freedom binds me harder. 

People come across very different to me then. I see a disconnect between what i see in them, freedom, and what they say they are. Their exercise of freedom binds me further. 

So this need to tell to explain self is fallacious. I guess my freedom is a myth. And if there is something called freedom, it is not free.

Jean-Paul Charles Aymard Sartre, the French existentialist philosopher, playwright, novelist, screenwriter, political activist, biographer, and literary critic said something relevant about freedom. ‘Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.’

Shunning the need to say might make my freedom free.